We love because it’s the only true adventure. – Nikki Giovanni
You know when you get frustrated with your man? It seems like nothing is going right and you just feel “out of sorts” or just down right “hormonal” with him?? Sometimes you may have a disagreement with him and you KNOW you are so right!! Anybody out there on this one?? The smart girlfriend-wife takes the “High Road” on this one. That means that “being right” isn’t always what’s most important. One of my favorite personal sayings is that I have found that it’s more important to the health of the relationship for you to be “loving that right.” LOVE YOUR MAN and take the High Road. Be the better person. Forgive his blind-spots…we ALL have them! And once you chose the High Road; “STAY ON IT!” Don’t ruin the moment by telling him you’re giving him a “PASS” on this one and that he OWES you next time. Once you have “clawed your way to the top,” STAY THERE!!! Watch Love Grow.
Every woman wants to know if her relationship is the real thing. The girlfriend-wife desires to treat her man as her lasting love. I heard it said once that, “A great love knows the ignition of FIRE and the deep well of PEACE. Yours is such a love…a love to last the ages.” We all want to invest in a love that will last forever. How does one sustain such a love? If you hunger for such a love; then it is wise to STUDY LOVE. Love is part of a family that includes the components of faith and hope. In a letter
to some city dwellers in Corinth, it has been said, “And so faith, hope and love abide- but the greatest of these is love.” Love is tough. Love never breaks. That is the kind of love you want to encourage in your man and have as a foundation for your relationship. An ancient wise saying tells us that, “Many waters cannot quench love- neither can floods drown it.” When I have a disagreement or falling out with my man, I always tell him, “Even though I don’t agree with you right now, I love you.” It is a good thing to declare and affirm that which you see as “forever.” It keeps your relationship on solid ground so it can grow in a safe environment. The good news is that you can’t go wrong with choosing LOVE. Love always prevails. Love always wins. “LOVE NEVER FAILS.”
How does one take care of a “boyfriend-husband?” How does a woman make her man feel special in the “little things?” One thing that I have found to do that my man likes is that I anticipate THE DAY AHEAD. It’s just a little thing, but it says a lot. Each night before I turn in, I set the table for the day ahead. I place fresh flowers or a candle in the middle and set up all the placemats with their table settings ready to go. So when my man steps into the kitchen to start his day (usually way ahead of me,
because he’s one of those “morning people!”), I have already communicated something to start his day well. My actions say, “I notice you and your new day is important to me. I want you to feel loved.” In an ancient letter to the City of Ephesus, it spoke directly on the special treatment of husbands. It said a woman who is wise will “notice (her husband) and regards him and honors him.” The Oxford American Thesaurus defines “to notice” as to take into consideration, to look upon, to observe, to discern and show thoughtfulness. Sometimes I even leave my boyfriend-husband a little love note next to his plate to begin his day. I mention something I am grateful for that he does or what a great guy he is! As they say, “the sky’s the limit” so go ahead and be the woman who “notices her man” and send love ahead to greet him tomorrow! He’ll love it. I am living proof!
Here’s an amazing tool for the GIRLFRIEND-WIFE to carry around in her toolbelt. It’s called, “THE DO-OVER.” Sometimes my man or myself will come home “out of sorts” or what some people might refer to as “in a bad mood!” Surprising, I know, right?! If this is your man on a given day or night; all you need to do is access the situation. If it’s not the end of the world kind of mood; just an off-day, simply ask your man if he wouldn’t mind trying a “DO-OVER.” Acknowledge it’s been a rough day, affirm your love for him and simply ask if he wouldn’t mind exiting the house and coming in again for a “new entrance” and just start the evening all over. If it’s YOU that’s in a tangled up mood, humble yourself and tell your man you are sorry and would he give you a “Do-Over” just to make things right. This tool works wonders with amazing results! My man and I take turns on this one; actually walking out the door, and coming in again and starting fresh. Try it! You’ll be amazed on how something so simple can produce something so good!
Want to do something different with your man? If your guy loves you in perfume… here’s a really cool date! As part of your next date; go to your favorite department store and hang out together at the Perfume Counter. Get someone to help you that you like and start experimenting with different fragrances on one another! It’s a really fun way to get to know each other’s preferences and it might even produce some good laughs. If your guy is on the private side; you can always bring home a “Fragrance Sampler” which cosmetic stores like Sephora or Ulta usually carry; and create your own “Perfume Counter” at home! As the Song of Songs says, “I am my lover’s, the one he desires. My hands dripped with perfume, my fingers with lovely myrrh.” Enjoy the man you chose and delight one another!
What is so COOL about having a “DATE NIGHT” with your man?? A lot of things! When you set up having a regular Date Night with your guy, it creates something to look forward to that has NOTHING to do with the everyday routine and sometimes grind of life. Forget the bills! Forget the deadlines at work! Forget the diapers! It’s time for the LOVERS to come out to play!! It’s time to put all the “Have To’s” aside and just ENJOY EACH OTHER! If you have children, decide ahead of time who is going to organize the sitter and who is going to set up where you are going. We like to take “turns” so that all the planning doesn’t fall on the same person over and over again. It doesn’t have to be “PROM NIGHT” just because you are going out! You don’t have to spend a lot of money. Some of our BEST DATES have been grabbing a deli sandwich and taking a beach walk. We save up for the “OVER THE TOP” dates which may involve a birthday or an anniversary and may include dinner in the City or a hotel getaway. The important thing is to just DO IT!! Make these fun times a regular occasion in your in Love Story and ENJOY YOUR MAN!!
I saw a row of padlocks recently all lined up on a fence overlooking the Golden Gate Bridge of all places. It immediately reminded me of the human heart and all the many rooms within. In every relationship there are open doors to certain rooms and locked doors where you decide it’s “off limits,” NO ENTRY ALLOWED. When we stop practicing forgiveness with our man; we start shutting off and shutting down. We “decide” which times we will give him another chance, and other times it’s just a “NO GO.” Before we know it, we have our own little row of “padlocks” all lined up. In healthy relationships, the locks come down. If “your row of locks” are starting to pile up; take a moment and reflect. The Girlfriend-Wife wants complete connection with her man. Take one lock at a time intentionally UNLOCK it and give your man another chance to make it right. You’ll be glad you did. Watch the “gate of your heart” start to open and you are free to truly love your man again.
I used to think it was the “end of the world” if my boyfriend-husband didn’t agree with everything I said or thought. We did fall in love with our husbands because we thought they were unique and we were fascinated by that! It’s pretty much impossible for every human being to completely agree with every thought of another. Life would be quite boring if that were the case. Embrace the fact that your man has his own point of view. Honor his individuality. Don’t be threatened by that. When the matter is not crucial to the health of your relationship; affirm your love for your partner and agree to disagree and leave it at that. Different points of view can weave a richness into your Love Story. Enjoy your man and be open to new ways of looking at things.